Bridezilla? Or frustrated with incompetence?

I seriously thought that I was going to go to jail this past weekend back home. MULTIPLE times. What does that say about my weekend home? Only that it was epic, and one that I will remember with a certain fondness for many years.

The first instance I thought that I was going to be handcuffed and dragged away was at David’s Bridal. While a part of me in convinced that the women are used to verbal abuse, I still felt that my sister was going to take it to the next level and starting slinging fists.

Here is why:

8 weeks ago Tori went dress shopping (without me) and feel in love with a gown. She went in to try it on but they only had it in the unreasonably small size of a 4. She didn’t care she wanted it. She then went through the process of getting measured. My sister being a very fit and healthy woman is a size 8. A size that many women would kill to be. Cue to this past weekend.

Wanting to have that “moment” with each other I waited patiently outside the fitting room for her to be laced, hooked and zipped into the many accruements that go along with a dress. After 20 minutes, I started to get worried. I heard muttering, and well angry protestations. After another 10 minutes and apparently another bustier, Tori came out, and man did she look drop dead gorgeous. Only she didn’t look happy, instead she looked like she was about to murder someone. WHY you ask?

The dress didn’t fit, more it wouldn’t zip.

After about 30 minutes of back and forth and requesting to speak to the store manager who was one of the women who assured my sister that she was “a perfect size 8” I decided to take matters into my own hands. Especially since Tori had made it very clear she was not ordering a size 10 to take in.

First I saw that the slip, which is this huge bell skirt that goes up to just under the breasts wasn’t zipped all the way. It didn’t fit, and because of this the dress would zip over it! I unhooked it pulled it up and zipped that dress up in two shakes!

We then privately had our moment since no one was anywhere to be seen! I called back the store manager and explained the problem; she then had the seamstress take my sister back to the dressing room to get a bigger slip.

20 minutes later my sister was storming back out, spitting out FUCKS every other word, I seriously thought she was going to hit the seamstress trailing behind her. She stopped in front of me and said “Tricia Zip it again.” After taking off the slip (Tori said it was too hot and not needed) the lady still couldn’t zip the dress!!!

Ladies & Gents, the dress was zippable, it was tight but it did fit. And after I zipped it again, we were there for another 20 minutes talking about bustling. Needless to say after we got out of there both Tori and I were agitated.

We have decided to have our moment on her wedding day, not surrounded by women whose only purpose in life seems to be incompetently pushing for more alterations than necessary; this was also evidenced by a few other disgruntled customers back in the fitting rooms. FYI.

So yeah, that coupled with a very drunk family and some very interesting proclamations I spent the whole weekend just waiting for someone to call the cops. :D